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Not Confusing Vulgarity With Wit
#1
These glorious insults are from an era before the English language became boiled down to 4-letter words:

 
A Member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.”
 
“That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

 
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” – Winston Churchill
 
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” Clarence Darrow
 
“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” – William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
 
“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book;  I’ll waste no time reading it.” – Moses Hadas
 
“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” Mark Twain
 
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.” – Oscar Wilde
 
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one.” – George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.\
 
“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second … if there is one.” – Winston Churchill, in response.
 
“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” -Stephen Bishop
 
“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” -Irvin S. Cobb
 
“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” -Samuel Johnson
 
“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” – Paul Keating
 
“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.” – Charles, Count Talleyrand
 
“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” – Mae West
 
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” – Oscar Wilde
 
“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.” – Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
 
“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” – Groucho Marx
"Sooner or later everyone sits down to a banquet of consequences."  -- RLStevenson
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#2
YOU SEEM TO HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ILL USED VULGARITY, BUT WHAT ABOUT WELL PLACED VULGARITY ?
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#3
Fine examples of paraprosdokian.
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#4
I NEVER TRUST A GUY WHO WONT CUSS A LIL... Cool
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#5
(09-21-2016, 12:33 AM)matlock Wrote: I NEVER TRUST A GUY WHO WONT CUSS A LIL... Cool

Ahh..........I see.

Howsabout a guy who deliberately, intentionally, and repeatedly misspells 'fuck' as 'fcuk' every single time?

Would you think that it was some sort of indicator or referendum on his 'trustworthiness'?

I don't think that.

Perhaps he thinks he is sparing some snowflake's delicate 'feelings'?

Maybe.

As for me, I cuss virtually all the time, unfortunately.

I think that doing so betrays a certain lack of mental agility, or sheer intellectual laziness.

I always think of the perfect reply, the ideal response..............

........about two hours later..........
"Sooner or later everyone sits down to a banquet of consequences."  -- RLStevenson
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#6
You trollin me & callin me out here?
EXPLAIN YOURSELF! Tongue
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#7
Quote:
Quote:Howsabout a guy who deliberately, intentionally, and repeatedly misspells 'fuck' as 'fcuk' every single time?


Would you think that it was some sort of indicator or referendum on his 'trustworthiness'?

I don't think that.

Perhaps he thinks he is sparing some snowflake's delicate 'feelings'?

I think it's more to circumvent the many censor's

fairly common courtesy many users of cuss words do,
I so nothing negative about it at all
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#8
True Dave, there are femail lady wimmins about the place, for what its worth its an effort to "differ" if you will...
One does not wish to be a total crude & vulgar borish ass, all the time...
Believe it or not I have tried to curtail meself a bit.
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#9
Just a few minutes ago I heard one on Showtime told by the English comedian, Jimmy Carr, that immediately made me think of sevenmmm. It was:

"Most people agree that it is bad for a pedophile to live across the street from a school, but then it does reduce their carbon foot print."
I dream of an America where a chicken can cross the road without having it's motives questioned.
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#10
(09-20-2016, 02:35 PM)diverdown Wrote:  
“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” – William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
 

That quote seems to sum up the rest of them.  Some overprivileged upper middle class guy who thinks the value of words is in other people not understanding what you mean without having to look them up in a dictionary.  Words are about you getting across to another person what you mean or what you feel, and you use the simplest word you can think of to get your meaning across as clearly as possible so that the listener or reader is only aware of your meaning, not the words you use that don't help your meaning.

I deliberately reject Guardian reader type upper middle class words, the kind of shit that springs to mind too easily if you read that kind of thing too much or are subject to that kind of person pouring their shit into your ears, if there is another word that is simpler with more meaning and emotional clout.  Sometimes even vulgarity is preferable to using their words, when you are just too tired to think how to say what you mean but don't want to use their pompous words, words like shit are like saying I refuse to be programmed with your language and your way of describing my world. You also lose vital subtleties of meaning when you automatically use educated speak.

All the quotes are quite clever, but nothing really special.  They don't express any depth. In my opinion good communication has a primal quality, or remains quiet in the background allowing the primal quality to be heard, a bit like you go to a concert to hear the vocalist's magic voice and maybe his guitarist's magic guitar playing, but all too often music gets overproduced so all you hear is overwhelming background "music" sound so that you can't hear them. I find educated speak like that overwhelming background noise, it is a wall of noise.

(09-21-2016, 12:33 AM)matlock Wrote: I NEVER TRUST A GUY WHO WONT CUSS A LIL... :cool:

or some git who says to you please don't use that language here, when you have let a single word like "crap" into what you said.

It is so offensive to be saying something from your heart that is important to you and all the other person can do is pick one single word that you used unconsciously, which is how words should be used, and wasn't really relevant to the meaning of what you said, which was what they should have been listening to.....and completely missed.

Somebody so small minded that they didn't hear what you said and only focussed on something irrelevant. Somebody like that I would want nothing to do with, if I could I would walk away from them abruptly when they do that.

It isn't as if I use a lot of swear words, and I have heard "educated" hypocrites swearing a lot and when they do it they think it is cool. To pick on one single word in something somebody is saying is so offensive.
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